If it weren’t for the three o’clock hour at work I’m pretty sure that I’d be about twenty pounds lighter than I am. Three o’clock is such a difficult time. It’s the middle of the afternoon, and the motivation for the day is already gone, and at that point survival instincts kick in.And so does hunger.I eat my lunch at one o’clock everyday, so by three I’m hungry again. I know that’s only two hours, and I’m not a baby so I shouldn’t be hungry, but I am. Sue me.And some marketing genius decided to stuff the vending machine in the basement of a nearby building with peanut M&M’s. Those jerks. How the hell am I supposed to pass up peanut M&M’s when the three o’clock food craving comes? I can’t. Let’s be realistic.So instead I walk over to the vending machine and I swipe my debit card. What kind of idiot (genius) decided it was a good idea to accept credit cards at vending machines? I never bought peanut M&M’s at the vending machine before they accepted credit cards. They’re $1.35, and I never have cash, and even if I did have cash I’m not going to fork over two perfectly good dollars, so instead I’d go peanut M&Mless.But now they accept my card, so I overpay for peanut M&M’s. And they’re delicious.However, as much as I love peanut M&M’s, what I really want is some almond M&M’s.At some point in the not-too-distant past I purchased almond M&M’s at the grocery store checkout lane. However, they seem to be unavailable now.A couple of months back, out of the blue, I craved almond M&M’s. As I checked out at the grocery store I scanned the candy rack and found plain M&M’s (how boring!) and peanut M&M’s (good, but I eat those all the time). However, almond M&M’s were nowhere to be found.Ever since then, every time I’ve been in a store I’ve been on the lookout for almond M&M’s.I checked the grocery store checkout lane. No luck. I checked the dollar store that has every candy imaginable. No luck. I checked the party supply store. No luck. I checked Target, and Wal-Mart at multiple locations. Still no luck.I began to wonder whether some well-meaning, but foolish executive had decided to do away with almond M&M’s. Maybe their taste buds don’t work. Maybe they’re part of the peanut lobby and they recognize the clear, blatant superiority of almonds. There’s no way that peanuts can compete with almonds, so they just gave up and sent in the reps who know all of the dirty tactics.In my seemingly endless search for almond M&M’s I’ve come across plain, peanut, and crispy M&M’s. Coffee Nut M&M’s are a thing. Did you know that? So are chili nut. I’ve had both. Chili nut actually has more spice than I expected. And now caramel M&M’s exist. Caramel! They’re delicious. You should try them. You won’t be disappointed.Unless you’re looking for almond M&M’s. Then you’ll be disappointed.Wasn't that well-written and fun to read? You should subscribe to my blog and we'll send you an e-mail every time I write a new one. Type your email address in the box and click the "create subscription" button. My list is completely spam free, and you can opt out at any time.
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