Although it’s seventeen degrees in Chicago right now, the Cubs play their first spring training game today. Thankfully they’re in Scottsdale, Arizona, where the current temperature is 71 degrees.Nope, no jealousy here! Why do you ask?They open the spring schedule against the San Francisco Giants. The same Giants who won the World Series four months ago. Jerks. That makes three World Series titles in five years for the Giants. Whatever. Just wait a few million years when California falls off into the Pacific Ocean. Then we’ll see how good the Giants are.I hate the Giants. But even if I didn’t hate the Giants, they’ve been winning so much recently that there’d be no way I could really root for them. Winning teams and I are like oil and water; we don’t mix.With baseball beginning—even if it is just exhibition games that don’t count for anything—I’m ready to reactivate that portion of my body that produces hatred (or at least intense dislike). And who better to shower some disdain upon than the team that won the World Series last year?Here’s the thing…as a Cubs fan, there are two teams: the Cubs and everyone else. Good guys and bad guys. However, White Sox broadcaster Hawk Harrelson always uses the phrase “good guys” so I’m not using it. I prefer Saints and Demons. The Cubs are Saints, and every other team are Demons.
This is the way it must be. There can be no “But I like the Cubs and the White Sox.” No you don’t. If you say that then you don’t like the Cubs. Maybe the White Sox permit their fans to engage in bigamy, but we Cubs fans aren’t down with that. You need more than one team? Fine. Keep your White Sox, but you better find another team to replace the Cubs. I hear the Marlins are always looking for fans.Saints and Demons thinking has made sense to me for as long as I can remember.During my formative baseball fan years (age five through nine or so), I lived in Springfield, Illinois. That’s in the central part of the state, 200 miles from Chicago, but only 90 miles from St. Louis. This map shows that in Sangamon County—where Springfield is located--55% of people are Cardinals fans and 22% are Cubs fans.I suspect that map was made by a Cardinals fan because while the Cardinals definitely have an edge in Springfield, I don’t think it’s a 33% edge.As I developed a love for baseball and the Cubs—both of which came from my dad, who grew up in London Mills, Illinois, a tiny village situated across two counties, Fulton (40% Cardinals fans, 35% Cubs fans) and Knox (41% Cubs fans, 33% Cardinals fans)—I was confused by Cardinals fans.How could they not like the Cubs? Ryne Sandberg, Jody Davis, Leon Durham. Come on! And how on Earth could they like the Cardinals? Didn’t they see the wickedness of Ozzie Smith, Vince Coleman, and Willie McGee?Liking the Cardinals seemed like a personality disorder to me. We had neighbors who were die hard Cardinals fans. The boy was my age and we were friends. He was a cool guy and he seemed so normal. But the Cardinals? What the heck was wrong with him?And then in 1986 the Saints and Demons issue hit too close to home.The Mets won the World Series. The New York Mets. Good lord I might have hated the Mets even more than the Cardinals. They were so pompous and lucky and good. Twenty-nine years later they still make my blood boil.How could anyone like the Mets? What’s likeable about Dwight Gooden, Darryl Strawberry and Keith Hernandez? Nothing, that’s what!But then I remembered that my very own grandmother—my own mom’s mom—who lived in New York her entire life, was a Mets fan. A woman who had the same blood as me liked the Mets! Such confusion for an eight-year-old boy. What if I turned into a demon?I gave my grandma a pass though. She didn’t seem much like a demon to me, even though she did like the Mets.I guess we all have flaws.PREVIOUS POST: Penis Size is Settled, Science Asks "Now What?"IF YOU LIKED THIS POST I BET YOU'LL ALSO LIKE: Banning Lorde's 'Royals' Not Enough Help for Giants+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++Hey, did you like reading this? If so, you should Share it on Facebook so you can bring joy to others. You can also find tons of other posts by me here. And you can like my Facebook page, Brett Baker Writes. Please.
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