Since you and I are both adults . . . what’s that you say? You’re a kid? Well stop reading right now please. This one’s not for you. Head on over to PBS, Minecraft or watch this horrible video that shows what happens when people think Chucky is after them.Okay, now that the kids are gone, let’s talk. I’m going to cover a particular topic, and I’m not going to mention what it is, but you know what it is. You’re wicked smart so you don’t need everything spelled out for you, right?Of my four kids, three of them still appreciate one particular aspect of this time of year. Although two of them are on the verge, I think, they both still appreciate. In fact, I think my older son might actually lack appreciation, but I don’t think he’ll say anything about it. I think part of the appreciation for him is sharing it with his siblings, and also seeing how much fun my wife and I have in making sure we enforce their appreciation.As we grow up there are many life lessons that we must learn, and some of them are difficult. They all come in due time, but this particular appreciation is something I think children ought to hold on to for as long as possible. Sure, that might cause them problems at some point when their unappreciative friends try to tell them what’s up, but I think the greater and longer the appreciation, the better.Unfortunately, many people disagree with me. I understand we all have our own opinions on this. And I don’t intend to try to tell other parents how to raise their children.Oh screw it, let your kids appreciate! Who’s it hurting? Not them.Well actually, it might hurt them, depending on when the appreciation dissolves. Kids will obviously begin to ask questions, analyze, and come to their own conclusions, and that’s good. That’s probably a sign that they’re not going to be too upset.However, if some childhood-hating adult, or know-it-all kid ruins my child’s appreciation prematurely, then for Christmas they’re going to get a lump of coal . . . shoved down their throat!There’s nothing more infuriating to me than when we’re watching something on television and out of the blue a character says something questioning appreciation. Are filmmakers really that stupid?The most egregious example of this is Gremlins. It’s not a kids movie, I suppose, but it is a movie that kids will watch. I mean who can resist Gizmo? It’s scary, but not cut-off-your-head scary. In fact, it’s one of the films that caused the PG-13 rating to be implemented for films that are too heavy to be PG, but too light to be R.Anyway, there’s a scene in the film where Phoebe Cates has a monologue in which she talks about why she doesn’t like Christmas. She tells this bizarre story about her father dressing up as a certain somebody on a certain night and falling down a smokestack and breaking his neck. Fine. Morbid, but fine. Then she punctuates it with, “And that’s how I found out (blah, blah, blah).”Who in the hell thought that was a good idea? At least Roger Ebert had the foresight to include a warning in his review.And the film Big Fish is even worse, with a two-for-one ruining. One moment a son is having a touching conversation with his father, the next, the son utters a sentence with a setup that had me diving for my remote control, but a moment too late.There needs to be some universal warning system for films and anything on television before they do something like that. Maybe the entire screen can go red for a split second ten seconds before the offending passage.Or better yet, I think we need a new term to discuss the whole concept. Hopefully you understand what I’m talking about, but shouldn’t we have invented some word that only adults know so that we can talk about this without sounding like we’re in the CIA or something?By the way, if you don’t want your kids to partake in appreciation, then that’s fine. But in addition to teaching them “the truth,” you better also teach them “omerta,” which is the mafia’s code of silence. Having a blabtastic kid is a great way to have your kid blackballed from kid events by parents who don’t want their own child’s appreciation ruined.So watch yourself. I’d hate for you to be singing “All I Want for Christmas is my Two Front Teeth.”PREVIOUS POST: I'm Thankful for Thanksgiving only Coming Once a YearIF YOU LIKED THIS POST I BET YOU'LL ALSO LIKE: I Suck at Christmas Shopping, But my Wife Doesn't+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++Hey, did you like reading this? If so, you should Share it on Facebook so you can bring joy to others. You can also find tons of other posts by me here. And you can like my Facebook page, Brett Baker Writes. Please.
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